tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5200111146126895398.post1322570698826054399..comments2014-08-14T00:15:31.356-07:00Comments on Lavender Lemons and Love: Chapter 10ThePrincessJuleeEllenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13453362288928531007noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5200111146126895398.post-29450499868233957262013-03-05T13:57:00.832-08:002013-03-05T13:57:00.832-08:00I appreciate your perspective Jena. I also was rai...I appreciate your perspective Jena. I also was raised basically without siblings near. I based my thoughts off of things I have seen but not experienced first hand. Also I think it varies a lot from one family or person to another. I agree that different circumstances from time to time will dictate the way parents choose to or need to parent. <br /><br />I agree there should be some kind of guiding principle but when it comes down to it each must adapt to their situation and make it work the best for them and not be stuck in a box so to speak. <br /><br />Thank you for sharing your thoughts Jena!ThePrincessJuleeEllenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13453362288928531007noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5200111146126895398.post-31636227334294681182013-03-04T10:31:08.601-08:002013-03-04T10:31:08.601-08:00A couple of my thoughts, also as a woman with no c...A couple of my thoughts, also as a woman with no children, who spent some time studying child development, but not a lot--more time learning about the mothers, actually-- and being the youngest in a small family.<br /><br />The second block quote bugs me a little because it presupposes that people have been in a large enough family with children spaced in such a way that they're able or even interested in caring for siblings. I'm the baby. My siblings are 6, 12, and 14 years older than me, and the oldest two didn't live with us. Maybe my sister could speak more to it, but from my perspective, I didn't notice a lot of nurturing-that-would-inform-later-parenting. In fact...<br /><br />Watching my sister, I'd say the biggest influence on her and her husband's parenting has probably been that their oldest son has autism, which requires very specific behavior, limits, and allowances. It filters to his siblings sometimes, though I also observe individual adaptations at times.<br /><br />I used to hang out with a lot of women who practice attachment-based styles of parenting, and I heard one of them say once that rarely does one really "do" any particular system of parenting. It might be your ideal--your guiding star--but ultimately, everyone does what works for and with each child. I think it's important to have guiding principles of what you think works with children--ultimately what works with PEOPLE--in general, but I don't think one should necessarily get hung up on details of systems, anymore than one would with any people. I do think the greatest guiding principle should be kindness, though.<br /><br />S'my two cents before I run to work.Jenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18278500937192058338noreply@blogger.com